I'm different!

I would like to quote author Fabienne Fredrickson, who once said, "The process of letting go of a false pretense makes you feel better as a person." Pondering over this saying enlivens all my moments of fake intensity and platonic happiness, which acted as a veneer to mask my countless insecurities and limitations. In the past, I've resorted to escapism as a route to gaining momentary pleasures and satisfaction, because I had distorted the reality of my life. Every single thing that was said or done was sensed as a conspiracy to demean and downgrade the foundation to my being. And little did I know, back then, when my chips were down, that it wasn't the world that had joined forces to alienate me. It was me who tried distancing myself from my own perspectives and prerogatives under the pretext of thinking that the world, which included people I had grown up loving and reposed immense faith in, was on a mission to tuck me under the carpet. Sometimes its wise to accept that you are the culprit in your own life.

The black dots kept increasing. And at times, some white dots made their way past the black dots very rapidly. I tried as hard as I could to close my eyes if I saw the white dots increasing in number. They distracted my focus, while I sat in a meditative state, cross-legged and hands folded. It seemed like the white dots were trying to encroach not only upon my vision, but also on my efforts to try and rid myself of unwarranted thinking and the fear of being relegated to the position of pleasing everyone. After 10 minutes of struggling to obtain a state of absolute nothingness and trying to place myself somewhere between being correct and incorrect, a picture replaced the many-black-and-some-white dots. It was a picture of me. And it represented idealism. It represented what "good" actually was. It was certainly not my conscience. Conscience takes you in a direction that you have established your thoughts in, whereas that picture went a step ahead to establish a new boundary and refurbished my tarnished conscience. After almost having forgotten to live with mental boundaries, and drawing a line between what was good and bad, every night of sitting with closed eyes and chanting a few hymns was my way of detoxifying my mind. It was high time I thanked more than I complained. It is true that sometimes utter confusion and pretense bring about a wave of serenity, which washes away all the past debacles, and gives you new reasons to hope.

For endless days, once I started retaining my peace of mind, I kept pinching myself to check if I wasn't dreaming. How else do you justify being on a totally different tangent in a short span of time by challenging yourself to all the things that you were hesitant to do owing to what would be thought and spoken about by many! I started trying to avoid conversations that revolved around gossiping. And that was mainly because I realized that, in the past, that was the very thing that kept me from getting closer to my real self. I had never realized that I had a choice to say no.  I no more wanted to struggle to find my voice in the chaos. I didn't want to be a part of the herd. I had decided that I was more important than a person's ego and misgivings: and if I wanted, I could turn a blind eye to what someone said or did. It was time to balance the inner equilibrium and make it so stable that no amount of soothing words or harsh taunts could ever tamper with it.  Soon everything started becoming an illusion. And the best past was that the illusion had no right or wrong. If my picture showed me what "good'' meant, it also let me interpret whether an illusion was good or bad, in keeping with my sanity.

The path I have chosen is my own. And what's special about my path is that it is unique to me. I don't want to share it with anyone for the simple reason that others may not be able to tackle the adversities it is filled with. I would also like to believe that not everyone has the secret picture that I have. And that picture needs no validation and acceptance. And I also know that this picture will take me through my path riddled with hurdles. And no, I won't feel jealous if the path someone else has chosen promises to be filled with calm and joy rides. I'm different. That secret picture, which also talks to me, has asked me to consider that example an illusion for my own sanity.  

Father's promise

Dad's the word!

"My name is Bageshree Mehta. I'm six years old. My mother's name is Bhargavi Mehta and my father's name is Ashit Mehta. I have one older brother. I love my family. My mother is a housewife and my father is a businessman. My parents love me. My mother cooks delicious food for me everyday. My father brings chocolates for me and we eat ice-cream together. My grandparents live with me. My grandmother is sixty-four years old and she wears spectacles," read my Grade 1 English essay. This essay dates back to almost seventeen years ago, which was also the time when terms words like "mom" and "dad" were not very commonplace. As a six-year-old, my life only revolved around my parents, with my eyes opening to my mother's voice, every morning, and my father kissing my forehead every night, before going to bed.

As much as I have vouched for my kin's generosity and able guidance, there are times when I feel that I haven't quite reciprocated their love in a way that, I often feel, I should have, especially when it comes to my father. Quite often I have had to take up the gauntlet of choosing between being my mother's muse and my father's darling. As a child, one never wishes to look beyond what meets the eye. All that appeals to a child is tenderness, concern and the feeling of being loved. And a mother seems to be a perfect representative of all these qualities. My father is an opinionated man. He has faced his own share of struggles to find his way up the ladder of success. A family man, who takes great pride in what he does, my father has always ensured that his kids forge an identity of their own. Today, when I reminisce about all the memories I have with my father, I realize that I've not spent enough time with my father. And all the memories that I have of my father suddenly seem insufficient. The bliss of riding piggy-back on my father or being carried in his arms every time I fell asleep in the car cannot be relived, but I can always, and I'm certain that I will, rely on the human luxury of being able to recollect the most treasured moments of life. And I also know that the good old days will never turn their back on me, just like I know that my father will not.

As a four-year-old, my father would make me sit in his lap and become my invisible driver, while taking me on a drive. He ensured that his preschooling daughter experienced a a high in her own little way through this happening. As a ten-year-old, I was ferried to and from school in a car just so that I wouldn't have to go through the travails that the children who travelled by bus would. As a teenager, who was transitioning into the real world, my father gave me a gift so big that I could barely lay my hands upon it. Freedom it was, folks. Freedom, in the most absolute sense, never comes easy. The freedom to form my own opinions, the freedom to make my own decisions and choices, and the freedom to follow the path I deemed best for myself. Back then, when I was given the freedom to be the ruler of my own destiny, I mistook the gift to be inconsequential. Today, as a young adult, my father continues to remind me of the importance of independence and single-minded devotion, while reposing faith in my abilities and taking pride in what I do.

I, in no uncertain terms, want to say that my equation with my father is a perfect father-daughter equation. No, not at all. I'd much rather that our bond remains real rather than perfect. And, for that, I don't have anything to regret. All that has transpired in the past has only contributed to making me realize the magnanimity of the sacrifices and commitments my father has made for me. Unlike my mother, my father never woke me up in the morning and packed my tiffin before I left for school. He, in fact, worked hard enough to ensure that his children went to a good school and received the best  education. Unlike my mother, my father never sang lullabies to me, but he ensured that I received comfort and luxury in my bedroom, so that I could sleep without a worry in the world. Unlike my mother, my father never gave in to my tantrums and emotional demands. He let me tire myself out into maturing after being emotionally drained. Unlike my mother, my father never extended his hand whenever I fell down. He decided to wait for me at the success line till I dusted myself off and prepared myself to get ready, once again, and finish any given challenge.

All you need to know about Facebook

It was a Friday evening, and my excitement levels had hit rock bottom as none of my evening plans had materialized. So, during times like this, when you don't have anything better to do with your time, because you're a bored adult who has outgrown television viewing, sucks at making long telephonic conversations and frets over insignificant things, browsing the Internet to preserve your sanity seems like a safe bet.

I'm quite an active user of Facebook. I joined the Facebook bandwagon in 2009 and ever since then, Facebook has found a fixture in my daily routine. What started off as a stint, by conforming to the rage, which Facebook very conspicuously was, later became a means to get my daily dose of personal updates on the lives of my Facebook friends, who can be categorized as curious relatives, acquaintances who became friends because of Facebook, stalkers, close friends and family, and random people you befriended only to increase your Friends list.

I have had various moments of contemplation in the last few years that I have been on Facebook, when it comes to how Facebook has impacted my perception of life and how it has resurrected my judgmental streak, despite all my attempts to subside it. And, after some serious thinking, I managed to enlist the various things that Facebook has put into perspective for me. The list goes as:

1) Adding words like "princess" and "angel" between your first and last names is not going to make you look any cooler than if you didn't add those words. The world can differentiate between a princess and a normal human.

2) Hitting "Like" and typing "Amen" every time you are conned into reaching out to an uncommonly ill person will not help the person get well any sooner. Facebook is not the means to cure all of the world's problems.

3) Checking "Other Messages" on Facebook is likely to inflate your ego. But, the self-pride slowly starts fading once you begin reading the content of the messages.

4) Getting over a hundred likes on a post does not, in any way, catapult one into the league of achievers and nor does it define you. So, just relax.

5) Candy Crush invites will be the major cause of World War 3. Like, seriously.

6) Posting "Hbd" on someone's wall, while wishing them on their birthday, would result in ignorance of the post just like a Candy Crush request.

7) Sharing your baby photos is the key to get you instant Facebook recognition and maximum likes. What are you waiting for, then? Go, reach out for the album.

8) Following a Humans of add a city's name is a mandate to stay socially relevant.

9) Changing your profile picture to a country's flag in a bid to show solidarity with the country that has been the victim of a terrorist attack will officially earn you the tag "dunce" and lead to serious judgement of your character.

10) You are not obligated to like your own post. It is understood that you approve of it or like it (not literally), since you are the one who has put it up there.

Facebook is one of those things for which you can rightly say "You can like it or hate it, but you simply cannot ignore it." To add to what I said, I have made it a point, this new year, to get myself to ignore all the pending friend requests from unknown people, even if that means not getting to boast to my friends about how I have some 70-odd pending friend requests. I WoULd AlSo LIke TO GivE A SPeCIAl sHOUtoUT tO aLL ThOse WhO WrITe CApTIons like "MaH LyF MaH RuLEs." 

Looking beyond the obvious

We often regard our external appeal in a more superior fashion than our internal elements, which often become bleak under the veneer of flesh. History is proof enough of the fact that man has always tried to look beyond what meets the eye in the larger context of life. And the following four instances just go on to prove that it is always the interior structure that decorates the house better than any outer wall.

She lay on the red couch with her eyes wide open, hinting at her melancholy mood and loneliness. She was wearing a pearl white, heavily embellished gown, with a thigh high slit, giving a glimpse of her flawless and radiating skin. Her long hair formed mop curls towards the end, reaching upto the ostentatiously decorated teapoy placed next to the sofa. Her almond-shaped, black eyes defied the societal notion of perfection. Beauty is said to lie in the eyes of the beholder; but her eyes gave a new meaning to beauty, generating the depth of an ocean. The ladylike charm that she possessed left a lasting impression on many a lovelorn heart. God's generosity was easily felt in her presence. She was nothing but an anomaly in the eyes of the world. Ironically enough, she often found herself torn between taking pride in her divine appearance and fulfilling the personal obligation of beautifying the soul and mind vis-a-vis her external appeal. For her, the paradise of beauty was more real than the armour of flesh.

Aarti Vemula, a third year student of computer engineering in Lucknow University, hailed from the Basauli village of Madhubani. She was one of the few girls from her village who had successfully completed her high school education, only to receive a scholarship from Lucknow University. Girls in her village often looked up to her as their role model in every context of life. She had the knack of striking a balance in all that she did. An academically bright student, she was also an ace Bharatnatyam dancer. The values instilled in her only added to her persona. Aarti was easy to please and she derived pleasure from ensuring that everyone around her was happy. A strong supporter of women's rights, she had always strived to set an example for other women by advocating gender equality. Her parents took great pride and satisfaction in watching their daughter become the torchbearer for all things good. Many girls in Aarti's village were victims of casteism and illiteracy, which kept them from achieving their ambitions. Aarti's biggest achievement arrived when people from Brahmin families in the Basauli village, who had, at once, laughed off Aarti's achievements by saying that her dalit status can never be overpowered by any professional achievements and aspirations, started looking upon Aarti as an ideal woman.

Amar Rath was a 28-year-old poor man who lived in Orissa with his parents, wife and handicapped, younger brother. Living off a meagre income of Rs 300 a day, life was indeed indifferent to Amar and his family. Despite having faced umpteen hardships in their lifetime and their ongoing struggle to make ends meet, Amar and his poor family, with time, had learnt to rejoice and celebrate every moment of happiness that came their way. Their helplessness and poor status didn't discourage them from reaching our to those that were needy and less fortunate like themselves. And for that quality of theirs, they had received ample adulation. One such act that defined the kindness and compassion that the Rath family was known for occurred during the time when Amar was 20 years old. Amar started working since he was 17 years old. He used to work as a peon in the office of a small-time businessman. One day while returning home from work, he met a farmer in his neighborhood, who looked like he was desperately in need of some help. Upon approaching him, Amar found out that the farmer, due to insufficient storage facilities, had sold off his harvest at a very low price for the fear that the harvest would quickly degrade. Amar tried consoling the farmer after learning about his dilemma, and offered to help him in his own capacity. Once Amar reached home, all the family members mutually decided to help the farmer procure some space of land, which would ensure enough protection for his harvest. The family, other than working overtime to collect money to buy the land for the farmer, ran from pillar to post spreading the word about the farmer's misery and asked everyone to help him out. Over a period of 7 months, the farmer succeeded in procuring 650 feet of land courtesy of Amar's family and his neighbourhood.

The Iyer community in South India is well known for being intellectual and highly qualified. And the community takes immense pride in distinguishing itself from the rest because of this distinct characteristic. A few people have achieved the remarkable feat of being prophets in the field of education. There come many times, in a lifetime, when one thinks he/she knows it all. And these phases lead to serious downfalls, which end up being the biggest learnings of life. Raman Swaminathan, a Mathematics scholar, always lived under the impression that there was nobody who could give him a run for his money as long as Mathematics was concerned. One day, his domestic help was busy finishing his household chores when two strangers, armed with guns, broke into his house and held Mr Raman captive at gunpoint. Not knowing what to do, Mr Raman, in a fit of rage, started abusing the two strangers verbally and stated, in no uncertain terms, that he would soon get both of them arrested. The two gunmen got furious upon hearing what Mr Raman said and shot him in the head. The house help was terrorized upon seeing his master lying in a pool of blood. Over and above anything else, he could not grapple with the fact that his master acted like a dunce. He, on the other hand, when the gunmen approached him, surrendered and started giving them everything that was within his reach, in a bid to divert their attention. He slipped out once he pointed to a corner, which he alleged, had some valuables. Once directed, he jumped to his feet to warn his master of the situation, and asked him to refrain from indulging in any kind of argument or pompous behaviour, but without any success. This incident, indeed proved that there is a vast difference between being educated and qualified. A well qualified individual may not always be well educated.

Confessions of a 23-year-old girl

                               

Whoever thought that dying alone is an option is delusional.

According to Cambridge Dictionary, a confession is an act of admitting that you have done something wrong or illegal.
According to Oxford Dictionary, a confession is a formal statement admitting that one is guilty of a crime.
In the context of this write-up, I'm using the word 'confession' to celebrate the idiosyncrasies and  anomaly that prevail in the life of a 23-year-old.
I'm not exactly proud of all my confessions; nevertheless, they make me who I am.

1) Still figuring out what I want from life
Career in its place, love in its place, fun riots take their own place, there is often a moment of sudden realization about where I'm headed. I'm often torn between wanting to be reckoned as a professional on the one hand, and on the other hand, I dream about reaching the peak of spiritual enlightenment and being able to look back on life, 50 years from now, and think that I have done justice to all my duties as a human.

2) Want to be pampered as a child and treated as an adult
Children's Day just went by, and in one corner of my heart, I harbored hopes about celebrating the day amidst fanfare and being doted upon like a little girl. And just the day before that, I tried to convince my parents to let me take our car for a 2-day-long outstation trip and made them buy into the argument about how I was mature and responsible enough to be trusted with car.

3) It's quite early to get married
Marriage as an institution, especially if it is my own, sounds quite exciting and fulfilling as an experience. But, every once in a while, when the question of marriage pops up, my only reply is ''There is still some time for marriage. As of now, it's a little early.''

4) Mind over matter
One of the sure shot signs which signals that one has catapulted into the mature adult league is to know when to let the heart take precedence over the mind and vice-versa. I'm trying, albeit slowly, to make a proper distinction between when to follow the heart and when to let the mind rule supreme.

5) Happy being single
Dozens of people feel that a 23-year-old girl cannot be happy if she isn't committed or on the lookout for a probable match for herself. And guess what, this apparently makes my life absolutely boring and unproductive. Nevertheless, I seriously doubt that assumption.

6) I am still studying
Adding to the supposed misery of the previous claim, I'm still a student. Can things get any more unconventional? Let me say this, here; I'm not working and I'm a single woman, but my life is not all that bad and cringe-worthy.

7) I hate partying and I'm a teetotaler 
You heard that right. My idea of a perfect weekend is enjoying a cozy dinner with my set of people and indulging myself in the company of a novel.

8) I have a 24x7 playmate
My round-the-clock play buddy is my 8-year-old Golden Retriever; Lucky. Our play dates include sloppy kisses, playing fetch, cuddling, belly rubs and long drives.

9) Music makes my world go round
I shall always remain indebted to the person who invented music, for my life would have been grotesquely incomplete and lacked essence had I not been exposed to the musical world.

10) I'm on a permanent chocolate diet
Chocolate and I are like conjoined twins; you will never find us in isolation. And, if I had my way in life, I would officially add chocolate to the list of bare necessities for survival.

All I'm hoping, now, is for some of my confessions to find a permanent fixture in my life. Can you guess which ones are they?

It's a LoveFools affair!

With the head chef and the owner of The LoveFools Dinner Lab; Sarita Pereira.

On the first floor of Pereira House, which is located right opposite the grand Pali Village Café, is the newly opened The LoveFools Dinner Lab. This authentic dining space pays the perfect ode to the falling number of bungalows, carrying an old world charm, in the city. This joint's exclusive range of cuisines combined with its soothing décor make for the best ingredients for a perfect outing with a bunch of pals, a high-end corporate dinner or a cozy luncheon. The restaurant is very passionately referred to as ''a labour of love'' by Sarita Pereira, the owner and head chef of the eatery, who once worked as an advertising professional at a HR firm.

Food has always been seen as an extension of art, holding the power of celebrating various cultures through their traditional cuisines, by Sarita, who underwent rigorous training in food making under the tutelage of Nandu Jubany in Calldetenes, Spain. The LoveFools Dinner Lab was born out of Sarita's long-standing passion for all things culinary and her desire to go professional with this craft. Research and Development form the core concepts of this restaurant, which derives heavily from her need to literally provide an experience, that has an artistic pedigree to it, to all its visitors. Every meal is curated as per the preferences of those dining, while following a strict pattern of preparation.  The focus is as much on the finesse of the dish as it is on what goes into making it. Since an exclusive 8-course-meal is prepared based on the cuisine that is selected, be it a lavish Mediterranean spread or a typical Rajasthani fare, the bookings are taken a week prior to the day the reservation is made for.

The community table that seats 12-14 people at one time is the highlight of The LoveFools Dinner Lab. It is situated inside a cozy-looking cabin that is adorned with a wall with partially uncovered bricks, giving the cabin a very rustic charm. So elegant and cozy is the feel of the restaurant that one instantly gets tempted to make the place his/her home. The aesthetic appeal of this small dining joint is enough to lure food connoisseurs and people with a penchant for good living, alike, from all corners. One cannot miss noticing the window pane that finds a place exactly opposite the community table. A renowned Mumbai-based architect had been hired to oversee the task of bringing to life the restaurant that Sarita had envisioned. The head chef along with the sous chef, Swati Adhikari, have been very particular about the quality of the edible content that is served, and they believe in accurately weighing every bit of what is added to a serving. An example of their dedication toward their craft was palpable when they mentioned how they take 3 days to prepare caramelized onions, which must bear the perfect texture and retain authenticity in its taste.

Upon visiting this restaurant, you will be greeted by a book shelf that stocks an extensive range of books on food and the process of food-making. The restaurant also restores a little balcony that opens up to the hustle and bustle of Pali Naka, allowing one to take a drag or two and revel in the beauty of the location. What remains with you, long after you have left the place, is the experience that you have been treated to. Quite literally. You are assured of looking at food in a completely different manner, with your attitude toward food very willingly changing into that of a novice. I, for one, was hungover from the evening. Whether it was Hot Mozzarella, the highly palatable Bucol, the frozen popcorn or the oh-so-yummy Chocolate and Lemon ice-cream, every dish seemed hell-bent on making me burp all the way back home. I have been well fooled into loving The LoveFools Dinner Lab.



Picture credits: Aditi Deshpande

Leo or Virgo?

Over the last few days, a news story about how a new Zodiac sign has been discovered by the NASA scientists, because of which the Zodiac chart will undergo a change, has been doing the rounds. If this is true, then the Zodiac signs of a huge number of people should change. I, for one, who is quite a Zodiac aficionado, upon hearing the news, instantly took to assuming that all my existing personality traits would cease to remain the same.

Having been born a Virgo, a number of characteristics typical to this Zodiac sign have, over a period of time, started to seem relatable to me. And a handful of the traits that I have refused to assume the ownership of and have vehemently rejected have now faded away into oblivion, as far as I'm concerned. The perfection that a Virgo is associated with is one of the handful qualities that I'm still trying to contend with. Amidst all the ongoing struggle and being on the cusp of claiming to be a true Virgo, i wish to disprove the changed Zodiac chart. So much so that even before finding out the personality traits and qualities of a Leo, I, in no uncertain terms negated and dissociated myself from every quality that a Leo is known to possess. Until some time back, I was torn between my sun sign and moon sign. The reason being that every time I would beg to differ with a certain point or statement mentioned about my sun sign, I would switch over to my moon sign and find solace, while looking for qualities that, I think, describe me perfectly well. On the one hand, if a Virgo woman is known to be a nitpicker, who is known for her subdued charm and grace as much as for being usually detached, a Leo woman is known to be akin to a lioness; larger-than-life and extravagant.

Recently, I read an article in a leading news daily, that spoke about how some avid followers of Zodiac signs, after hearing about the apparent change in the Zodiac chart, have already believed that their trajectories are going to change and that their lives have started to look aimless. I, on the other hand, turned to the most reliable news sources to obtain the correct information, and at the same time thought about what to make of my Virgo-symbol tattoo. My tattoo, a replication of one of the Virgo symbols, has often been mistaken for my initials. As much as I shirked, before, every time someone pointed to my tattoo and linked it to my initials, the threat of having to sport an incorrect tattoo, and in my case, an obsolete one, made me rethink about what my tattoo actually signifies. A Leo woman, who is often known to embody a dramatic personality and talks nineteen to the dozen, is a far cry from a Virgo woman. But, till the time I don't get a final update on the status of the zodiac chart, for my sanity, I'm going to try and fit into the character of a Leo woman, in the ways that I can, just so that I can refer to them as an extension of my personality, if the need arises.

Till now I have played quite a safe game when it came to switching roles between being a zodiac fiend and thinking of zodiac signs to be nothing more than a mere past-time, with consummate ease. I have reached a stage where I've almost decided that the signs that are supposed to be good matches for a Virgo woman are actually going to be the ones that I'm going to turn to, and will form a proud association with whoever is in possession of those signs. On a positive note, I think I should, now, also consider the signs that supposed to be good matches for a Leo, along with those that are compatible to a Virgo, so that I can experience the best of both worlds and get to choose from a wider range of sun signs, while looking for a match for myself. Or better still, get a Leo-symbol tattoo.

Truth or Dare

Let me take a few seconds to explain what this game entails. I call this game a choice of the brave hearts. In my definition, a brave heart is someone who defies all odds through mental resistance. Today, I have decided to challenge myself to this game in which one has to make a choice between revealing the truth and performing a dare, every time one is at the receiving end of a question. And to make this experience more revelatory, I have decided to talk about the existing truth every time I choose a dare and, similarly, when I choose to speak the truth, I shall also take a dare that will hopefully add to showing me where I stand.

Here are some truths and dares I decided to brave...

Round 1
Choice: Truth

Q: What do you fear the most in life?
A: Regret. I fear living a life, looking back on which, ifs and should haves would have transcended all its barriers.

Dare:  Go out, now, and indulge yourself in any one thing that's been on your mind, but you let procrastination get the better of you.

Round 2
Choice: Dare

Dare: You just threw a chocolate wrapper and a bunch of used paper napkins on the ground. Go and apologize to the man, there, who is sweating it out to keep the streets clean.

Truth
Q: Have you ever disregarded or discriminated against someone who holds a lower status than you?
A: Yes. I have, a lot of times, intentionally and unintentionally, taken people with a not-so-strong background and position in the society, for granted.

Round 3
Choice: Truth

Q: What would you prefer: a) A zombie apocalypse or b) A world in which the purpose of a human life would be defeated by war and the evils of the human mind will intoxicate the world?
A: A zombie apocalypse

Dare: Pick up your phone. Scroll down your contact list and give a call to those whom you are no longer on talking terms with because of ego clashes, insecurity or whatsoever the area of conflict may be; but, in one corner of your heart, you wish to bury the hatchet and reconcile, and talk your differences out.

Round 4
Choice: Dare

Dare: Starting now, don't use any electronic devices for the next 24 hours.

Truth
Q: Do you agree that your digital life has, in more ways than one, intruded into your personal space and marred the relationships that have taken years to take the shape that they have?
A: Yes, my relationships have been affected, by the technological revolution, in a way that has altered the base of my relationships, inadvertently.

Round 5
Choice: Truth

Q: What, according to you, is the one thing that adds to the charm and worth of your life?
A: The ability to be unique and yet be able to relate to the finer nuances of the living race, at large.

Dare: Work toward creating a world in which all lives matter, equally. Make sure to start by simply heeding the unspoken pain and suffering of all those lives that cannot help themselves.


Revelations are like ceasefires that try every possibility of glorifying our individuality by staring in the face of life. Quite unlike what many of us would take this game of Truth or Dare to be, it is best aimed at inducing self-awareness as opposed to making one laugh his/her gut out while the game lasts.

Turning 23 with the joy givers

Growing up, my birthdays followed a stereotype of cutting a cake that, with a lot of difficulty, would bear my 9-letter-long name and wearing a fancy outfit to school and standing out in the midst of all the uniform-donning students. The highlight of every birthday celebration during school years was enjoying watching all my classmates and teachers, alike, croon a birthday song with the highest level of zeal and gusto, while animatedly, clapping their hands. I would be doing great injustice to my classmates if I didn't mention how we would look forward to partake in the ritual of distributing chocolates in the class. What lovely memories these are!

Quite unlike the situation that is prevalent on birthdays, while one is a child, celebrating a birthday as a grown-up entails different idiosyncrasies. Birthdays, at this point, become an annual ritual, just like any other, where everything that makes one happy, including the many obligations one tends to live with, forms the crux of the day which makes the biological clock sail into a new year. My birthday, this year, was a little different. I decided to spend it with a bunch of stray/abandoned canines at an animal shelter home called Animals Matter To Me Rehab Centre. The day of my visit coincided with the day on which the organization was going to reach out to 1200 stray dogs through a sponsored food programme, which saw many animal lovers and social workers come together and take their love for the four-legged animal to another level. All the individuals that contributed to the completion of the task came from different backgrounds; but, the one thing that equated all that were in attendance was our common love for animals, and the fact that each one of us represented the same school of thought; Animals Matter To Me.

I spent a lot of my time, a day before my birthday, mulling over what should be bought for the dogs at the facility. Carrying some packaged food, along, seemed like the best option, given the fact that the sniffers were going to be fed hot snacks earlier in the day. The dogs pleasantly greeted me when I reached their facility. Hundreds of food packets, equally loaded in two vans, were kept ready to be sent out for all the strays in the area. What seemed like a noble act, at first, turned out to be a well-defined step, serving a bigger purpose of shaping the perspective of hundreds of pedestrians that bore witness to this act of kindness. Some of the dogs in the facility were seriously wounded and needed extra care and attention. A lot of the dogs were under treatment after facing high amounts of abuse as stray animals. A few of the dogs were abandoned pets who were found on the roadside in a deplorable condition. The canines that were deemed fit and healthy, and acted like the perfect hosts for the day, were up for adoption. The friendly and gamesome animals that these dogs made, they won all our hearts over with their conduct. I soon began distributing the food I was carrying along, among all the canines. The sight of seeing 20 tails wagging, in unison, every time I reached out for a new packet of food, was absolutely priceless. Never did I think that a bunch of dogs could manage to entertain me much more than I could possibly entertain them. Some of the dogs that were caged, due to ill-health, howled and desperately wished to be a part of the fun and merrymaking.

On my way home, I made a few halts to distribute the food, I was carrying from the facility, among  the strays. By the time I reached home, I was filled with an inexplicable sense of joy and contentment. Looking back, I felt happy prioritizing this visit over any other plans. I couldn't have asked for a better celebration, on my birthday, than getting to spend a few precious moments with some pure and innocent souls, who let me in on how they spread joy, day after day. I felt a little fatigued when I reached home, but not without a reason. My pooch, who was waiting for me to get home, was ready to shower me with his sloppy kisses and show me how he had eaten into my bouquet of flowers and covered the floor with its petals just to welcome me.

Forgiving a thousand times over

In a recently concluded lecture in my college, all the students were asked to describe their most embarrassing moment. My brain went into an overdrive thinking about all the occasions on which I had felt bad about myself. There have been times when I have also been left feeling humiliated, so much so that ''embarrassment'' has ended up being a euphemism for my mortification.

As humans, we often harbor dreams of being perfect in every possible way. And there may have been moments when we have been our most vulnerable selves. Also, we end up chiding ourselves for overlooking all the possible ifs and buts, every time we are left grappling with the undesirable outcome of an action that is based on the I-cannot-not-think-of-anything-better assumption. There are moments when walking around wearing an eyeliner that has smudged takes a toll on oneself. All the questions that occur in one's mind, following the moment of embarrassment, revolve around what the folks around would think of an unintentional lapse that is converted into a mammoth misdoing. The sequence of events that follows the lapse sees a dip in one's overall confidence, resulting in generalising his/her awkwardness. The length of time that these thoughts plays on one's mind is enough to relegate one to the place of a sub-human, who deserves no chance to live. An alternative to this drill is forgiving oneself as conveniently and swiftly as one forgives all else, preventing the fear of failure to loom large over one's blanket of confidence.

The day was hot and busy. The sun was shining brightly over the hour. My car was parked outside a stationery shop. I was inching toward the back door of the spacious stationery outlet to get some printouts.  While I was walking , I glanced at my ex-colleague, who I have always held in high- esteem, and is someone who has constantly pushed the envelope with her high standards of professionalism. I greeted her like a long-lost friend. I was quick to conclude that the aura around her was the exact same as I had experienced before. I had managed to take the printouts in under 5 minutes, after having a brief chat with my former colleague. As I made an exit from the shop and started walking, steadily, toward my car, I stumbled upon a big rock that left me flat on the ground. Looking up, from the level of the ground, everything looked chaotic. I managed to get on both my feet within 5 seconds of falling down. In the distance, I could see my former colleague-cum-friend asking, with the help of finger gesticulation, if I was okay. I gave her a sheepish grin and gestured to her that I was totally fit. As soon as I got inside my car, my legs started trembling and slowly began to show the brunt of the infamous accidental stunt. I tried to recreate the scene in my mind minus the embarrassment. I refused to accept the disgrace that was caused to me in front of someone I knew well. I refused to forgive myself for something that brought along a great deal of embarrassment.

When I was asked to recount my most embarrassing moment, I did not slip into deep contemplation for the lack of an embarrassing moment. In fact, I have been embarrassed more out of choice than out of compulsion. Do I wish to overlook my mistakes and forgive myself because I have no choice? No, since that would cause remorse every time I make a mistake. What I really wish to do is learn to accept myself more with every passing day to ensure that my mistakes lift off the facade of perfection that is wrapped around my mortality. Doing this would help me channel my inner mortal and make me happily forgive myself for all the times that I may have lapsed in the eyes of the world. And, not very late, I shall proudly show my pyramid of mistakes to all those that consider forgiving an act of the weak.